Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Can I Get a Witness?!

Is anyone else in need of some good news? I swear, I'm afraid to answer my phone anymore with all the bad news I get almost daily. Patrick HATES his job and is constant fear of losing it, money is tight, our health insurance is almost a weekly annoyance, Paige keeps having little stomach problems that we can't figure out the cause of, my cousin Tim was just diagnosed with cancer, my mom is working 2 jobs and she hasn't slept a full night since we lost my dad, we have no real friends here in Texas except my family, I'm scared of the direction our country is going, today is the 6 month anniversary of my dad's death, and on and on it goes. I feel like I'm sitting on the sidelines watching all of this go on with no power to do ANYTHING. It's such torture to watch people I love hurt and mourn and feel dejected and be powerless to help them. I'm so tired! I'm ready for some good news already. But then I'm reminded that I've already received the greatest news of all. God sent His Son into the world and He took ALL of my sin and shame and nailed it to the cross. I should be rejoicing in that news alone because it is more than I could ever deserve. He daily carries my burdens. He knows my every need, and He supplies it. I want to live in that truth all day everyday, but these stupid distractions keep popping up. My focus has become so blurred that I'm having a hard time seeing God in all of this - but He's there. In fact, He's right in the middle of it all. He holding us up and protecting us and providing for us and loving us through all of this junk. I keep hearing the verse where Jesus says that in this world we will have troubles, but take heart for I have overcome the world. He is in control. Nothing is a surprise to Him. Nothing is hard for Him. And He promises that He will not withhold any good thing from me if I follow Him. So, I am going to refocus and follow Him and trust that He sees what I don't. I'm going to allow Him to open my eyes to see the things that He is doing on my and my family's behalf. I'm going to lay aside my anger, hurt, frustration and fear, and let Him have complete control. Peace only comes from trusting Him, and that's what I'm going to do. This is no easy task. It's not like I just decide to do this and all of this stuff goes away. Oh no! In fact I fully expect the devil to hit us even harder as we trust in Him all the more. But all of these trials and struggles are a means to either pull us further from our Lord or closer to Him. I need to press in. I need to give Him my fears, failures and struggles daily, if not minute to minute. I need to arm myself with His Word, and speak truth into the lies that the enemy keeps hurling at me. I can't give up. I won't! I am more than a conqueror in Christ, and it's time I live like it. I'm done being depressed and defeated and ready to step into joy regardless of my circumstance. So, although there are a lot of reasons to complain and be sad I am going to live on the Lord's strength and not my own.